sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
