dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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