God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
The air was thick with penises
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
