if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
sarcasm needs its own font
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
