my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
