I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
