Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
