Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
