so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
