I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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