Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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