Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Randomize
