Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
