Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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