can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
barbara walters just said penis...
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
