I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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