How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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