May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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