someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
