Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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