This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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