We need to rekindle our bromance
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
