Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
