Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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