dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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