yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
