New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
