I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
