Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize