You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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