Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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