I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Randomize
