why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
