Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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