You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
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