I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
