ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize