I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
