I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize