Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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