You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
