Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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