so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I think a kid would responsible me up
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
