Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
