Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
