She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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