whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
We're too hungover to prance.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
