i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
