i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
