if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
