Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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